Overcoming Perfectionism through Faith
“God took away all the Skittles!” I cried incredulously to my husband, my sister-in-law, and really anyone else who I thought would listen and/or care.
Isn’t that a weird thing to be upset about? And let me be clear, I was extremely upset and on the verge of spiraling. Why? Because of my battle with overcoming perfectionism.
Let me provide some context here. I am currently the ministry leader of a MOPS group. If you don’t know what MOPS is, it stands for “Mothers of Preschoolers” and is an outreach ministry aimed at bringing moms together to provide practical and emotional support while parenting during the preschool years. We aim to introduce Christ to those who haven’t met Him yet while also strengthening the faith of those who already know Him. Big goals.
For our first meeting of the new semester, I planned to play a fun ice breaker I found on Pinterest that used Skittles to steer the conversation. My slideshow was all done and all I needed to do was buy some Skittles.
Except when I went shopping, there weren’t any Skittles. I went to multiple stores and scoured the aisles and front registers for one measly bag of Skittles. I also had my husband search for them, just in case I simply overlooked the right area on the shelf. But no, no Skittles were to be found that day.
I know what you’re thinking. Couldn’t I just use M&M’s, or Starbursts, or any other colorful candy? And the answer to that is no, I couldn’t, because I already created the slideshow and there was a fun pun in the title about getting to know you a Skittle.
I’m going to jump ahead here and let you know that I did buy some M&M’s and change the slideshow and we played the exact same ice breaker just with chocolate instead, and it was just as fun and I survived the first meeting and people came back for the second meeting.
The bigger, God-size lesson here is that I was placing so much emphasis on perfecting the details of this meeting, that I wasn’t leaving any room for God to do His thing and meet me in that space.
My perfectionism was holding me back from allowing the Holy Spirit to do his transformational work in my life and in the lives of those at our meeting because I was personally trying to control every aspect of our meeting, which is not my job at all. It’s His. And I was supposed to just show up and let Him do the work.
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Overcoming Perfectionism through Faith
I’m not going to lie to you and say that I’m all fixed and my days of trying to reach an unrealistic expectation of perfection are over. I’m still breathing, so I still have work to do here on earth. But I do want to share some of the lessons God is giving me for overcoming perfectionism through faith.
Christ is perfect, so I don’t have to be.
Hebrews 5:9
9 And being made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation to all who obey him
Jesus is the source of salvation, and He was made perfect. No matter what I do here on earth, I will still fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). I can never be perfect, no matter how hard I try.
But I can take comfort in the fact that Jesus overcame this world (John 16:33), and I am a new creation under Him (2 Corinthians 5:17). I don’t need to constantly strive to be perfect because Christ is already perfect.
God’s perfection provides a refuge.
Psalm 18:30
30 This God—his way is perfect; the word of the Lord proves true; he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him.
God’s perfection provides a place of refuge for me, so I don’t need to spend my time trying to reach my own, unattainable picture of perfection.
Christ already paid the price for me.
John 3:16
16 “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.
God knew that we would never be able to make it through this life without a savior, and He loved us too much to leave us drowning in our place of sin.
So He sent us His only Son to save us and give us eternal life when we believe in Him. That takes so much pressure off of me! God knows I can never earn my salvation, so He sent His Son to pay the price for me. And it’s already done. That debt is already paid. My job is just to believe it and live it; not to turn to my own idol of perfectionism instead.
God is still working in me.
Philippians 1:6
6 And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.
God knows that I’m still going to struggle with overcoming perfectionism. But He provides a way through it, and I don’t have to dwell in this place.
I can move forward, trusting that I can do my best without trying to make sure everything around me is “perfect” all of the time, and God will fill in the gaps. He is working in me while He’s working through the situation at hand, and I can trust in His sovereignty without believing that I am somehow in control or that I can “mess up” God’s plan. I need to step back and allow God to do the work in my life.
God, thank you for being you. I am so grateful that you are perfect and that you sent your perfect Son Jesus to pay the price for me.
I pray that through grace and faith you will heal me of my desire of perfectionism. I pray that I will step back and allow you to do your work in my life, and I pray that I can remember to rest in your perfection rather than striving to create my own sense of perfection. Thank you for your sovereignty. In Jesus’ name, amen.
It’s a funny way for God to speak to me, by taking away all of the Skittles. But I am so grateful that He knows how to cut through my prideful heart and speak to me in a way that I will listen. I am definitely still a work in progress, but I am so grateful that overcoming perfectionism through faith is a possibility, and that God will continue to do this work through me and for me.
Blessings Friend.
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